Still scared: First-gen idol Son Ho-young on persevering through almost 30 years of hardships

Everything has to start somewhere.

For god, one of the first-generation K-pop acts that helped lay the groundwork for the genre, the boy band began in an infamously run-down, isolated building in the middle of nowhere in Gyeoggi.

Son Ho-young debuted at the age of 19 as a member of god — a group produced by JYP Entertainment founder Park Jin-young and HYBE founder Bang Si-hyuk — in 1999. The quintet’s rocky road to debut is well documented, as the five members famously had to fend for themselves after their agency effectively cut them off for months in the aftermath of the 1997 Asian financial crisis.

Looking back, the now 46-year-old said that those experiences helped make god a tight-knit unit.

But such hardships, he clarified, are “not something that you really need to experience.”

Son also admitted that he was in awe of those working in the industry today.

“Younger groups these days are much better than us; we’re the ones drawing inspiration and energy from them,” he said during a recent group interview at the headquarters of god’s agency, Gemstone E&M, in western Seoul, ahead of the release of his solo single “Go Around.”

“Thankfully, we were able to build something lasting, but [younger idols] have done far beyond what anyone could have imagined [in our day],” he continued. “So we’re doing our best to keep up without embarrassing ourselves in front of them.”

After hits such as “One Candle” (2000) and “Lies” (2000), god is now nearing its 30th debut anniversary and is still going strong, making festival appearances and holding concerts.

Son also continues to perform as a solo artist, with this year marking 20 years since he released his first solo full-length album, “Yes” (2006). To commemorate the milestone, he will release “Go Around,” his first new music in five years, at 6 p.m. on Wednesday.

The digital single is a minimalist pop track with candid lyrics — co-written by Son — that capture the moment of stepping into a new world with faith in oneself, despite the uncertainty.

“I thought about what I could sing about now, and what came to mind most was that, looking back, everything turned out alright,” he said, adding that he wished that he could tell his younger self this. “What I wanted to say [through the song] is that you can take a detour or rest — or even choose a completely different path from the one that you’re on.”

That message comes from someone who describes himself as a highly sensitive person — a perfectionist with many regrets who often revisits past choices.

“One thing that I often talk about with my fans these days is that we’re just getting started,” he said with the signature grin that earned him the nickname “the smiling angel.”

“I’m the kind of person who takes a long time to do things. It takes me a while to learn, grow and prepare, so I feel like I’m still refining myself.”

After a tumultuous journey spanning decades, Son speaks openly about his struggles and how he is still "scared of making mistakes."

“In the past, I used to practice for eight hours a day, thinking that if I worked hard enough, everything would always work out. I even set impossible goals for myself,” he said. “Looking back, I wish that I took the time to find the right music for myself and my strengths instead.”

Going solo, in particular, was the first time that Son realized that effort didn’t automatically lead to good results. His ventures into acting also brought difficulties and, at times, regrets.

Through that process, however, he built a solid career, which extends into musicals and plays and even actively helping direct god’s performances.

Son’s sensitivity and empathy remain his defining traits. He enjoys listening to others and offering advice and once seriously considered studying to become a licensed counselor, though he had to abandon the idea after learning that the career requires years of studying and practice.

But he still has plenty of conversations with those around him, including, recently, with members of Tomorrow X Together.

Son recently made a guest appearance on MBC’s reality program “TXT’s Parenting Diary,” a reboot of “god’s Parenting Diary” (2000-01).

“What I’ve learned from talking to many people is that I can’t always give them the right answer,” he said. “But I can tell them this much: You can have any kind of experience, no matter which choice you make.”

The veteran artist said that he is in awe of aspiring idols who endure intense pressure from a very young age.

“I’m not certain if I would have survived such fierce competition,” he said. “Those who go through it gain a much broader view of music and the world.”

But he acknowledged that, for god, years of shared hardship have fostered a strong bond between the members.

“Above all, I’m confident in the god members’ patience and who they are as people,” he said proudly. “They’re real people — real human beings whom I’m proud of and admire.”

BY SHIN HA-NEE [[email protected]]